H2H3 run 162

 GO YOUR OWN WAY
(With acknowledgements and apologies to Lindsey Buckingham )

Hua Hin Hash House Harriers ' Run Number 162 began and ended at a location behind the old Immigration Office on Saturday 21st November and was attended by hordes of Hashers as well as by the Hares, Cathusalem and Iron Lady. In the lead-up to this great event Cathusalem demonstrated the type of paper to be sought and followed, the format of the checks and how to break them informatively for the benefit of the slowcoaches behind, but he omitted to mention that H2H3 was about to encounter more checks than were present at the Prague Spring! He also issued a warning that there would be no Runners/Walkers split in the trail and that, Blasphemy of Blasphemies!, Walkers should take every opportunity to Shortcut in order to get back in time for Church on Sunday.

Suitably bewildered the Hashers OnOned in the direction indicated and soon ran across the first of the rings of no confidence which indicated a check, whereupon many of the Hashers deployed in a semblance of a skirmishing formation to seek the ongoing trail while others hung back in reserve to see the lie of the land. Second Guessers were thinking in terms of of the concrete road up to the Monks' Village but the trail crossed over that road and appeared to be heading for the track up to the new shrine. However before that point was reached the trail veered off and recrossed the Monks' Village road - this was the day's first doublecross - and flirted with the foot of the hill for some distance before bending back down and around the Falcon Hill development. Now H2H3 were headed towards the last easy access point to the hill but when it was reached only a False Trail went a little way up it so, unsociable as it may seem, the hill was left unmolested by the
Hash on this occasion. Having spurned the hill the trail now led through some fairly thick brush and scrub before gaining the more open terrain of a pineapple plantation. A circular tour of of these fruit fields led to an exit through the last barbed wire of the day and on to a tenuous trail to the pond on Soi 102. From this pond the trail led down Soi 102 and turned left behind the facing Falcon Hill sign and then straggled across a vast open steppe of territory where a lot of the paper had been blown away or eaten by cows or lost Hashers. Cognoscenti found paper by following the logical route back to basics and not by following paper to find the way home but strangers had to improvise and get back the best way they could find - be it ever so circuitous.

Eventually all the Hashers made it back to the car park arriving as they did from many of the 16 major points of the compass and now it came to pass that the Leo was copiously consumed by the relieved and grateful survivors.
Storytelling abounded as Hashers exchanged information on where they had been that afternoon. The sorely-missed but seldom-seen Rolo, making a rare public appearance, confessed to having lost the paper at one stage and decided to follow someone in front but when he looked ahead he said" It looked like the Tartar hordes sweeping across the hillside with people going in all directions". Mickey Mao reckoned he had seen more paper in a Kandahar karzi and was only saved from a long weekend of "boonie-bashing" by a chance encounter with some more knowledgeable Hashers. Mudman reached his own back garden in the attempt to re-orient himself as to where he ought to be going and other Hashers actually circumvented SukSabai on the way back, without even calling in on Mary CanCan. Ballbanger claimed to have attempted to count the checks but after exhausting digits, even after removing socks and shoes and undoing his fly, he abandoned the effort. Just as well because
only George W. Bush would have believed a count made by a Floridan. Steakhouse , the G M, put an end to all this romanticising by calling the Circle and DownDowning the Hares, the Returners, and various other notables including Thierry Henry in absentia but personated by a willing, thirsty volunteer. Long Ron advised us that next week's CAH3 Hash would be just over the bypass and off to the left from the Springfield Road . Steakhouse reminded us that the next H2H3 Hash would be on the King's birthday and asked us to dress appropriately, i.e. in yellow. He then closed the massive Circle and directed the multitude to the Khun Oy Restaurant for a very enjoyable, albeit somewhat roisterous OnOnOn.

SCOTCH TAPE

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